He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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