i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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