is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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