Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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