17 year olds will be the death of me.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
You did what with his pubic hair?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
