We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Randomize