Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
