Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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