Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
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Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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