Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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