Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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