Do you still have your period?
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
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