i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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