Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
