I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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