Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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