So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize