I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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