Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
