I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
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