Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize