Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
We have started to decorate penises.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize