Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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