So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
