Whod you bang
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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