so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
