my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Randomize
