I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
