Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(407): View more from Florida

So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"

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(440): View more from Ohio

Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."

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(518): View more from New York

She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(604): View more from British Columbia

mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.

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(248): View more from Michigan

I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...

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(+61): View more from Australia

im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter

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(727): View more from Florida

I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?

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