I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
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