i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
