i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
