Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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