Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
