You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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