i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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