No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
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