can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
