Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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