she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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