Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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