Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
one might say we're banned from that church
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
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