pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
