does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Randomize
