He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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