Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
