Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
