Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
