The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
