Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Someone shattered a urinal.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Who died my cat blue again?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
