I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Randomize